reach the residents

[ximilian]

● ● ● REACH THE RESIDENTS

For any questions you want to ask Viveca or Degar and receive an IC response, please direct them here. Please indicate in the subject line who you are trying to contact.

// VIVECA

Hi, what can I help you with?

// DEGAR

Today was gonna be the day, but they'll never throw it back to you. And by now, you should've somehow realized what you're not to do.

▶ NAV

Comments

[firstroar]

[Blue doesn't respond right away, just staring at the room ahead of him while processing it. the taste of bile stings at his throat, prompting him to swallowing back on.]

The cost...of living...even though I'm already... [dying. rapidly.

he swallows again.]

Who is...tendering that exchange, Viveca.

[vivecai]

Perhaps some have told you this already, but what you give in order to come here is your time. You sacrifice the time you spend here, to get your regret undone.

[ a long preface to the actual answer to his question, that. ]

That is why if you die during a mission, there's nothing I can do. If you die on the station, there's a chance I can bring you back, but on missions... I can't affect any of it. And your time, there too, belongs to the Orb, as it will until your regret is undone and you are sent home, or until you decide you no longer want to be here. So if you die... you only come back if the Orb allows it.

[firstroar]

...

[much to think about.

after another length of time:] Viveca...will it be the same for us, then? Seeing those wishes of ours come true...with that dreadful consequence? All for the orbs' amusement.

[vivecai]

No, it won't. Because you've made the deal with proper terms.

[ that's the key: make the deal so that the orb can't abuse it. ]

Welford Branson didn't know what he asked, and so couldn't make an informed choice... or set real boundaries. That let the orb do what it wanted. It hasn't been like that in your previous missions, has it?

[ remi had been very clear in his bargain, and the orb hadn't been able to act outside of it... the same with cheri, and even with so-yeon. as long as those making a bargain ask for something clearly, and make it clear what they offer in return... well. whatever tragedy comes is often from the choices of the ones making the bargain, not because of the orb. ]

[firstroar]

[was it? Blue can only wonder. he wasn't able to read the hearts of neither Remi nor Cheri, unable to feel their truth in the outcomes that befell them. he could feel Ford's, and it...informs a lot right now. right now, that remorse and suffering is too comfortably set in his head; no one else is here! he can't sense anyone else.

how humans handle this...he has no idea.]

Real, informed choice... [did he truly do that? in his heart?]

...What happens...if that choice changes? In your heart...in your will.

[vivecai]

You may ask the Orb to recognise that change.

[ change his regret, and make sure the orb agrees... and pay whatever price needs to be paid for the change. the orb is not benevolent, after all, but he hardly needs to be told that. ]

[firstroar]

...

[just one? Blue wonders...if having so many in the station's possession changes anything. he wonders...but doesn't ask.

instead:] Show me how, please.

[vivecai]

[ she makes a sound like a long exhale, despite not needing to breathe. ]

You need to fall asleep, and the Orb will contact you. It will ask a price of you, then — to change the regret means to give up something else than what you already have. You can bargain with it, offer it something you are willing to give up.

[firstroar]

[Blue listens, but he does not answer; she can linger or leave at her leisure, to tend to others' needs. it changes little of his perception with his eyes closed, given how he can't sense her anymore. or anyone.

how lonely.

with all this in mind, Blue will accept sleep more readily, though an anxious heart makes it a struggle, fearing that in sleep he'll not have the words for his wishes...or the wish at all! the sleeping heart and mind could perhaps seek out other things...could perhaps not want what he wants right now.]

Don't change it.

[when the call does come, the words of his wishes do find him in sleep. thank goodness.]

My sin... I won't ask for that to change. Not anymore. [not with everything he's seen, the repercussions. and moreover...] No matter what...my life with them is over. Don't undo my regrets of the past. Just the one of now.

As I am... There will be no means to fight to change anything, whether I want to or not. I will die unfulfilled either way, and the power spent to bring me here...will be for naught.

If you need regrets to fuel these fires, then take this one instead: I regret...not being here sooner. Stronger. Further away from death so that I may be able to stand properly at everyone's side. Help, not hinder.

Give me the strength to live. To help them. The road back home...you can take that in exchange.

[...]

I'll never see them again. My people. But I'll keep my eyes forward, and my reward for sealing my past...will be something of a future.